Some people are under the misconception that I can read minds. I cannot. I am an empath, not a telepath. Watari is the one that understands that the least. While he is frantically trying to cover up one of his inane, random thoughts I am being bombarded with all the emotions connected with that thought. It doesn’t really bother me until Tatsumi walks into the room. I am actually thrilled that I can’t read Watari’s thoughts, the emotions that he holds for Tatsumi are enough on their own to make me blush.

I wasn’t surprised that Tatsumi understood this about me. As careful as he is of the words that come from his mouth with the same care he covers his emotions flawlessly. In fact, on the rare occasions that I do feel his emotions I know it is because he wants me to. Like during the incident regarding Tsuzuki and the Tern Snake...

Tsuzuki...now, he surprised me. He understood perfectly well of my condition and he was fairly good at keeping his emotions in check. This I never would have expected of him when we first met and even though he is not as good as Tatsumi it is not due to lack of skill. He just forgets. Most of the time due to the intensity of the situation.

However, now it is different. After that day in Kyoto, the day he tried to die. Truly die. He has held his emotions in check with a fierce determination that is....terrifying. Then when I look upon him with his broad smiles and carefree laughter, I hurt even more. He has even found a way to hide the pain in his eyes. He looks the same as always, like before. And it is a lie.

I find myself at his door now. It is raining outside and I am grateful. The great tears from Heaven cover the tears of my soul streaking my face. I wipe them away as I knock on the door. My fist was heavy, it had to be, it was late in the night and I knew I would have to wake my partner.

He came to the door, a wide smile and speaking my name with that false cheer in his voice. It hurt so much and I instinctively placed my hand over his mouth. Tsuzuki’s violet eyes widened, but he stopped talking.

I removed my hand and spoke, " You are empty inside."

He frowned at me slowly before turning back into his apartment. I followed, closing and locking the door. I sat beside him on the couch, he was looking down at his hands, playing with his fingernails.

" I don’t want to hurt you..." his voice was soft and full of the pain he had been hiding all along.

" This hurts even more," I was so tired of his vacate emotions that I said what I felt, " To know you are hurting and don’t trust me enough to let me help you....that hurts."

He looked over at me then, those eyes of his shining with unshed tears. How could Muraki think those eyes demonic? They are the most pure things I have ever had the pleasure of seeing. It was the open honesty of those amethyst orbs that solidified his humanity. I began to cry.

Tsuzuki stared at me for a time before pulling me into his arms whispering apologies and soothing my hair. I wanted to relax into his embrace and let him hold me for a while, but that was not the reason I came here.

I started pushing him away, yelling, " No, no! Don’t touch me! You are the one in pain! Not me!" I looked up at him through blurry eyes and tousled bangs, panting and willing myself to calm down. I knew I was glaring, but my voice was steady when I spoke, " Please don’t comfort me."

He nodded silently and it was at that moment I realized he was crying too. He sighed and leaned back against the sofa and draping his arm over his eyes he cried some more. His voice was slightly broken when he whispered to me.

" Holding you comforts me."

I blinked, stunned at that admission. I played the words again and the same warm tingle that ran through my body when he first spoke them spread through me again. I slowly leaned over and placed my head on his chest and sighed when his arms wrapped around me, holding me tightly.

Tsuzuki whispered again and I felt my hair being disturbed, " How strong are you?"

My eyesight focused on his coffee table, staring at a nick in the dark wood as I took in his words. I knew what he was asking, what he wanted to do. I wasn’t sure if I was ready for it, but I knew I could handle it.

I spoke clearly so Tsuzuki would know I was serious, " Do what you wish."

He squeezed tighter then proceeded to reminisce, " I really wanted to die Hisoka," as he spoke he let his emotions flow, dropping all walls, they washed over me like a tidal wave and I clenched my teeth and shut my eyes against the power of it all. There was the suffocating darkness of self hate and the helplessness of grief. Depression so painful it hurt my soul.

" I hated everything that was happening around me, all the death and pain that I could not stop," More walls crumbled and the blackness thickened an I held my breath to keep from crying out, " I thought Touda was the only way...it never occurred to me that someone would care..." a deep sadness now and a sense of regret and embarrassment.

Tsuzuki’s grip tightened and it actually felt as if his fingers were burning into my flesh, "When you came to me I was shocked and....touched."

An emotion washed over me considerably more powerful than all the others Tsuzuki has allowed me to feel. I don’t know what it is though, but it is pleasant and it encircles my entire being in a comforting warmth that I try to snuggle deeper into. Tsuzuki has stopped talking and he is humming a lullaby, I don’t know why but it makes his emotions all the more wonderful.

" What...what is this?" I whisper my question, not wanting to break the moment, but needing to know what sort of emotion Tsuzuki was allowing me to feel.

I felt Tsuzuki’s smile, the joy of it passing through any remaining barriers I had up. He sighed and whispered into my hair, " I care about you deeply Hisoka and if you truly want me to stay by your side I will."

I nodded then tilting my head back I looked into my partners vibrant eyes. He was looking down at me too, his expression unreadable, but I didn’t really need to see his face to know his true feelings. For the first time since we met he opened up completely to me and I was overwhelmed, speechless and flattered.

His hand came up and stroked my hair while his head tilted ever so slightly. There was a brief moment of hesitation, then, his lips touched mine gently. It wasn’t a deep kiss and our lips never parted, but the heat was magical and I just knew I was falling. It was a slow fall, one that would land me somewhere warm and content. Tsuzuki was falling too. I could feel him joining me in this new and exciting journey. I gripped him tighter and deepened the kiss, I was pleased when this drew a moan from him. Soon, too soon, he parted from me and panting softly whispered, " I will stay for as long as you’ll have me."

I smiled softly, " Promise me you will never hide from me again..."

He nodded and his chocolate hair bobbed with the action, " Never again Hisoka," he pulled me into a fierce embrace, " Never again."